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Why Do Women Fake Orgasms?

psychiatrist, sexologist, psychotherapist
  • Published:
    26 January 2024
  • Updated:
    19 February 2024
Why Do Women Fake Orgasms?

For many women, just like men, it is difficult to talk about what they like or dislike in sex. The common result is that a woman cannot achieve orgasm and simulates it.

10 reasons why women fake orgasms

  • To finish intimacy faster. If the intimate contact lasts too long, the partner may try to stimulate the man so that he can reach the end.
  • To show their sexuality. For young women, the motivation to fake an orgasm is often related to the desire to appear experienced and express their interest in the partner.
  • Simulation = orgasm. There is a common belief that if you fake an orgasm, eventually you will have one. Practice shows that this is true for some girls.
  • Not to disappoint the partner. Women strive for the man to feel confident and not experience guilt or shame, and for his self-esteem to increase.
  • To get aroused. Simulating an orgasm causes increased excitement for some during both oral and penile-vaginal sex. The possibility, methods, and speed of achieving orgasm depend on individual characteristics.
  • Wrong beliefs. Some girls think that orgasm is the main goal of sexual intercourse, which is why they cannot relax during the process and simulate it.
  • Not to appear inadequate. When there are systematic difficulties in achieving orgasm and a woman realizes that she may not be able to reach orgasm or that it will take a long time, it is easier for her to pretend.
  • Out of habit. If a woman has been faking orgasms for a long time and suddenly stops doing it, the partner starts to suspect something and ask questions. The woman is trapped: confessing means admitting to all the past deception, so it is easier not to confess and continue simulating.
  • External factors. For example, some fear losing their partner. Sometimes unresolved conflicts hinder satisfaction, and many feel embarrassed and ashamed when the topic of sex arises.
  • Temporary health issues. These include fatigue, illness, unwillingness to disconnect from problems. Perhaps the woman does not understand herself and her desires, or does not know how to tell her partner what pleases her and what she wants.

How to tell if a woman is faking an orgasm

During an orgasm, the muscles of the vagina, uterus, pelvic floor, and even the abdominal muscles rhythmically contract in a pulsating manner, and it is impossible not to notice this. If a woman only jerks her body, then it is imitation.

During a real orgasm, the body posture and facial expression involuntarily change: the neck arches, the head tilts back, the facial expression distorts, and the cheeks turn red. This blush is explained by the influx of blood to the head.

Currently, a woman cannot control herself, and while the movements of the neck and head can be faked, the blush and facial expression cannot.

When the breathing remains steady. Most often, during an orgasm, women's breathing becomes irregular, and their heart beats faster.

Until the orgasm is over, a woman never breaks contact with the erogenous zone, whether it be the penis, tongue, fingers, vibrator, etc.

If a woman hurriedly goes to the bathroom or takes a bath immediately after orgasm, it may indicate that she faked it. After an intimate act, some time is needed to recover because in the first few seconds after orgasm, thoughts become confused and words mix up.

How many women fake orgasm

According to a study conducted by scientists in the United States in 2019, 58 percent of women have faked an orgasm at least once. This number is slightly higher among young women. Scientists also found that women who are unsatisfied in their relationships are more likely to fake orgasms.

Some women emphasized that they want to have an honest conversation with their partner but feel fear or embarrassment. An honest conversation can significantly improve your sexual life.

Be open and discuss your desires and preferences - this will lead to satisfaction and strengthen your relationship. If you find it difficult to do it on your own, seek help from a sexologist.

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